I could not disagree more with The Other Colbert Report's post "The Threat of Same Sex Marriage". My reaction and comment is as follows:
"I must politely and whole-heartedly disagree with you. From the very first sentence, this post is completely devoid of empirical evidence and relies solely on personal opinion and personal experience to make its point. How, precisely, has the “rise of same-sex marriages” caused the definition of “family” to morph and take on so many different forms? And why is the notion that a family can be something other than the stereotypical definition of “mother+father=2.5 children” so bad? Honestly, it is these narrow-minded, rigid beliefs that are limiting us and causing irreparable damage to our society. I posit that it is not same-sex marriages threatening the notion of family, but rather the unwillingness or inability to think in a progressive fashion and evaluate situations different than one’s own.
Should marriage always be limited to a man and woman simply because it “always has been”? Furthermore, if we are to exclude the evolution of marriage and reduce it to what it once was, are we to treat women as property and marry them to men to make political and economic deals rather than base it upon love? An evaluation of the full history of marriage blows apart the “always has been” theory because marriage has not always been what it is now. Also, one must consider marriage across different cultures. Arranged marriages between child brides are still very commonplace in certain parts of the world. In certain villages in India, female children are promised to male children in order to increase the wealth and prosperity of the families. To most Westerners, this practice is backwards and not “morally correct”, but to the members of those villages, this is just how life “has always been”.
How does assigning gender-roles help children? Are we to tell little girls they can’t race cars or fly an F14 because “it’s too dangerous” and “only boys can do that”? I was told that as a young girl and it infuriated me. Are we to tell little boys that they can’t sing and dance and show emotion because it “isn’t manly”? How is that going to help develop our children into fully formed people? Answer: it doesn’t. While I admit that men and women do have different psychological and physiological needs and modes of expression, enforcing gender-roles diminishes our abilities as both men and women to explore and fully understand what it means to be HUMAN. It is this gender-biased mode of thinking that prevented women from voting until the 1920s and in the 60s prevented women from being on juries because white male America felt it would “distract them from their domestic duties”. As history has taught us time and again, separate but equal is never equal.
My father raised my sister and me largely alone and we did not have a female influence in the house for a large portion of our lives. Do I feel as though I missed out? Absolutely not. I feel I am a very strong person who is able to think critically and overcome any adversity thrown my way. I am married, have a job, and am going to school. I donate to charities and volunteer when I can. I create art. I live, I love, I laugh. My family life in my formative years was not a stereotypical family, but I am no less of a person because of that.
If our children are being harmed by anything, it is the lack of compassion, acceptance, and progressive thinking. It is being shamed for having a heart’s desire outside of their assigned gender role. It is being stuck in frigid, loveless nuclear families that focus on “what has always been” and “what is morally right” instead of focusing on love. I posit that instead of limiting the love in this world, we expand it. No matter the situation, a child surrounded by love and acceptance will prevail and will truly understand the beauty of the human experience. Marriage should be based upon love, plain and simple. Out of everything in this universe, love is the most holy and sacred. So why not join those who love each other in holy matrimony, regardless of gender or sex? Limiting love based upon fear and prejudice is the highest of blasphemies, and I have never understood those who limit love with one breath and speak of holiness with the next."
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